All you need is love...

Having Ryan home today has been totally awesome. He has been really loving and sweet and it's just been beautiful to me. I can't say enough times how blessed I am to have him in my life.

You see, Ryan has been mega stressed with ship stuff and it *kind of* made home life a bit different. He wasn't the sweet, adoring, complementing man he once was. Things HAVE however recently changed. There were some rough things going on at work and he was doing the work of 2 1/2 people. It was insane. Well, things have gotten much better because he isn't doing all that crazy work anymore, though he is still doing a lot of work.

Anyway, onto the loving and sweet part. A shipmate of his came to the house last night because he needed some stuff sewed (no, I don't sew, hubby does [I'm not a normal house wife lol]) and he ended up staying and hanging with us until about 1 am. Ryan was being really loving even then, in front of his ship mate. Given we were drunk, but it was soo cute how he would hug me and say "that's my girl" after me letting out a burp, lol. Today we were at lunch at Firehouse Subs and he randomly said, "This is awesome" so of course I'm curious what exactly is awesome (I assumed it was his sandwich lol) and his reply was one for the books, "Being here, with you". It almost made me cry and gave me goosebumps. Of course I'm on my period but it also means so much to me when he says something like that because of the fact that things weren't like that for a while and I didn't think they ever would be like that again.

Tonight he and I are drinking moscato, watching creepy movies and sitting by the fire and you know what? THIS is awesome.

Q & A

I was *FINALLY* tagged to do this q &a by A Sailors Valentine so here goes nothing!

Rules

1. Post the rules (and link up who tagged you).

2. Post eleven facts about yourself.

3. Answer the questions the tagger set for you, and create eleven new questions for those you tag.

4. Tag however many people you want.

5. Let them know you tagged them!

Eleven Facts About Me

  1.  I am the youngest sibling in my family by 9 years. I was a change of life baby.

  2.  I used to be OBSESSED with chewing raw noodles. So obsessed that I would have some in my pocket or in a bag in my purse at all times. I felt like I needed it to survive lol.

  3.  I  once almost fell off the side of the Great Smokey Mountains and I had nightmares for at least 10 years about it afterward.

  4. I graduated high school when I was 16..

  5. I want nothing more then to be blessed with a baby.

  6. Before I met a guy in the military I lived in the same city. My whole life. Same house as well for the most part.

  7. I don't want to go to college because the thought of spending all that money on it then not being able to find a job like so many other college grads totally freaks me out and makes me think it isn't worth it. Plus, I'm scared that if I go to college to do what I want to do, then get a job in that field, I will end of hating it because someone is telling me what to write about and that just isn't as fun as blogging and writing poetry.

  8.  I'm not a big fan of necklaces or bracelets but I adore earrings.

  9.  I bit my nails until I was 24. To this day the habit I formed to keep myself from biting my nails (picking my cuticles) is still sticking.

10.  The only 2 brands of purses I will buy are Kathy Van Zeeland and Coach (can't exactly afford it, but it's the only other one I will get). I'm a purse snob. 

11.  I was homeschooled in high school because I was too social in public schools and got into fights as well. It's funny though, because if you know me in person, you know I'm not one to fight. Guess I just got it out of my system when I was younger haha.

Sailors Valentines Questions: 

1. What song did you dance to at your wedding? We danced to Don't Wanna Miss A Thing by Aerosmith. It was very bittersweet and I cried because Ryan was set to deploy 2 weeks later.

2. Where did you go on your honeymoon? Did you have a honeymoon? We haven't had one. We stayed at a bed and breakfast for 2 days though. We love that place.

3.  Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Still married to Ryan with at least 1 kid and out of the military. Living a lot closer to family, too :)

4.  If you could be any Disney Character, who would you be and why? Belle. She has such a kind and loving heart. She is one of my heroes.

5.  What is biggest challenge for you, as a Military Spouse? The ever changing schedule. This was supposed to be Ryans last underway on the ship but they added another so he will be underway ONE MORE TIME before he goes on shore duty.

6.  If you could pick your dream car, what would it be? Honestly? I love my car. To make it my dream car all you would have to do was deck the inside out in Hello Kitty and paint it a glittery hot pink

7.  What's your biggest pet peeve? Crinkling bags. I seriously can't stand it. It makes me seriously angry and makes me want to punch the person causing the noise. I really can't take it.

8.  If you had to live in one place for the rest of your life, where would that be? Hmm... Honestly? Virginia Beach would be the answer BUT only if all my family could live here too.

9.  What's your favorite dessert? I don't really have one. I guess I'm weird. We aren't big on sweets. I LOVE Chez-its though.

10. Do you wear your spouses/significant others Dog Tags? Do you own a set? I wore his while he was deployed but I don't own a set.

11. What's the best present you ever received from your spouse/significant other? His love. He truly is the biggest blessing I have ever received. God blessed the broken road.....

MY questions:

1. What do you love the most about your life?

2. How do you get through the rough times?

3. If you're in the military, what is your favorite and LEAST favorite thing about it? If you are a military s.o, same question!

4. What is it you do for a living? Do you enjoy it?

5. If we were to go out for a night on the town, where would we go and why?

6. Do you prefer coffee or tea?

7. What are your future plans/goals?

8. What are your favorite qualities about your significant other?

9. Why do you blog?

10. What is your favorite color and why?

11. Do you have anything exciting happening soon? If so, what? (remember OPSEC)

Now for the tags! I not only chose these people because I love their blogs BUT some of them could also really use new followers!

Kelsey @ Bear at Sea
Alyson @ Eisley Rae
David @ Getting inside the game
Samantha @ His Perfect Vision of Imperfection
Ryan @ Just a Phase
Brittany @ Tales From a Sailors Soulmate
Brittney @ The Vintage B
and
Sarah @ Confessions of a Sailors Wife

Nail Files

 I am loving this link-up! What a cute way to get followers! Anyway, here are my nails and what is on them: The pink is "All Kendall-ed up" by Nicole for O-P-I and the orange is a color you will never be able to get because it's Sunfire by Mary Kay (Mary Kay hasn't sold nail polish is over 5 years, maybe longer!). I know, the Mary Kay one is ancient haha. It's the only nail polish I have that is older then 2 years old. It's held out pretty good!

Anyway, go link up @ Fabulous But Evil!

Number 4

It's a significant number for us. This is my forth period since we started TTC again. I have to wonder if my hormones are still jacked up at this point. I started my last period a couple hours before midnight on the 31st and ended it on the 5th so basically I have started and will be ending 2 periods in one month. That is just a tiny bit rediculous to me. When does it get normal again? When will I get pregnant again? When will I be happy again? These are just a few of the questions I can't help but ask myself when I start my period. I just feel so emotionally drained...

Oh the bright side of things, I got a babysitting job today and that makes me feel pretty good. I will have a steady income coming in so we will have a little more extra money every month. Hubster is on his last underway EVER right now and I like that about life too. Honestly? The only thing rough about my life right now is the TTC and how hard it seems to be to get pregnant now. If anyone read my blog before, they know already that we only tried for like a month and a half and BAM I was pregnant, just. like. that. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever get pregnant again. I might sound like a drama queen since it's only been 4 months since we started TTC again, but it's just hard to think I will ever be able to have a baby now. I guess time will tell.

My song this week

Amber @ Goodnight Moon (go link up!) posted her song and it was a song from Tangled. It reminded me of how emotional I got when I saw the movie in the theater. Ryan was deployed and I missed him terribly. I missed his touch, his face, the love he showed me. I missed having my second half in my arms and I was just a *little* jealous of Rapunzel and her new found wonderful love. When it showed him dead and how sad she was, I cried like a baby.

This song is what caused all of the emotions to start. It reminds me soo much of Ryan and I. Two (supposed) normal people that fell head over heels for eachother. So, without further ado, here it is:

Do you Tweet?

I am looking to gain followers and find other awesome people to follow so if you tweet follow @DawsonsPrincess and leave your username in a comment on this blog! Thanks in advance! =)

This is for YOU!

This is for the young women that are waking up at 6 a.m. every morning with small precious children that they have been left alone to care for. This is for the pregnant Military wife wondering if her husband will make it home in time to watch their miracle happen. This is for the childless Military wife, living in a town or on a base alone where she is a complete stranger to her surroundings. This is for the women that feel like a third wheel when they go out with their friends and their husbands. This is for the Military wife that cancelled all her plans to wait by the phone, and even though the phone broke up and cut off every time you spoke to him you waited anyway. This is a pledge to the women that cry themselves to sleep in an empty bed. This is to recognize the woman that felt like she was dying inside when he said he had to go, but smiled for him anyway. This is for those of you that are faithfully in that long line at the post office once a month handling 2 large boxes and 2 small children like a pro. This is for that woman that decided to remodel the house to pass time, and then realized that she had no idea what she was doing and sighed and wished she had a little help. This is for all the lonely nights, all the one-person dinners, and all of the wondering thoughts because you haven't heard from him in days. A toast to you for falling apart, and putting yourselves back together. Because a pay check isn't enough, a body pillow in your bed is no consolation, and a web cam can never compare. This is for all of you no matter how easy or hard this was for you. Our military men are brave, they are heroes, but so are we. So the next time someone tells you that they would never marry a Military guy, don't bother explaining to them that you can't control who you fall in love with. Just think of this and nod your head, know that you are the stronger woman. Hold your heads up high, hang that flag in your front yard, stick 100 magnets on your car, and then give yourself a pat on the back. Be proud to be the woman that you are, be proud to be a MILITARY WIFE! ♥

Praying for Daphne

This little angel needs all the prayers she can get <3 Click the link to find out more...

Grammar nazi

I just can't handle it anymore. The constant grammatical errors and writing like English is your second language. There is a specific person I know who this blog pertains to but I highly doubt she has any clue just how horribly her awful way of writing offends me and others. I feel like, if you are going to write a blog dedicated to being a Navy wife, you should at least write like you graduated elementary school.

I know at least a couple of people who know what I'm talking about. When I read this blog, it makes my head hurt. Between trying to understand what the person is trying to say, to trying to figure out what she meant, I notice a headache coming on. Before you say "Well maybe she isn't from the USA", she is. There are a lot more things I would like to also say about said person but I just don't have it in me. I don't want to be that person. Not on my blog, at least ;)

What's YOUR song?

This is my song for the link up. You all probably know why. I can't even listen to this without bawling. It's beautiful and really intense. Go link up with Goodnight Moon too!

Guest blog: My husbands Navy story

First and foremost, I am Ryan, Brittany’s husband.  I was born in Indiana, lived in Hammond until I was ten, and lived in Hobart until I was 20.  Just after my 20th birthday, I joined the Navy, September 14, 2005 (which oddly enough is Brittany's birthday).  It’s been six years, just a little bit over.  During that six years is when I met Brittany, and that was the best thing to happen to me in all these years

    The first few years of the Navy were kind of blah. I went through boot camp, then “A” School, which is where I met my best friend (still).  After that is when I went to “C” School to learn the basics of CIWS (Close In Weapon System), here’s a link that pretty much describes it. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Close-in_weapon_system) I know that it’s Wikipedia, but the information is not wrong. There are other sites that have information and videos if you want to know all about it. It’s basically the last line of defense, with a six barrel Gatling gun to take down missiles.  Anyway, after “C” School was the ship. I’ve been on there since January 2007, five years ago, and I’m finally about to leave that beast.

    I’ve been on three deployments on the ship, though I was told I would be lucky to go on two. Well, I was told wrong.  The first deployment was not bad. We stopped in a lot of countries in Europe (France, Greece, Italy, Turkey, etc) and a few others (Egypt, Israel, Jordan, and Djibouti).  I did have a lot of fun, and I met someone who would lead me to Brittany in the end. Once we returned from said deployment, I moved in with that guy. I got a room for a fairly good price, and I wasn’t getting money for housing at the time.  He brought Brittany to Virginia in 2008 and that’s when we met, but that wasn’t when we hooked up.

     I left for my second deployment in early 2009; we went to a lot of the same countries as the first one.  That deployment was basically 8 months, which was bad and good at the same time. I saved some money due to situations.  Our ship ended up escorting a submarine that had collided with another vessel, we had to escort them half across the ocean, turn around, and finish our deployment. We were suppose to go to Liverpool, England, but due to that, we missed out.  After that deployment, actually the night I got back, I got drunk and confessed my love to Brittany.

Five months later, around Christmas time, I got a new car, and Brittany and I started dating on our way to Virginia where she was going to live with me anyway.  A few months later, I went on a month and a half underway.  When I came back is when everything changed. We had a little scare with certain protection, and it got me thinking, ‘Would I really want to spend the rest of my life with this woman?’  Well, of course, the answer was yes.  I proposed to her on the beach, which she left me hanging for what seemed like forever. But she said yes!  We ended up getting married July 30th, 2010 and we are still going.

August 2010 is when I left for my third deployment, this one was different though. Many reasons, this was our first deployment together.  This deployment was also all about anti-piracy, so we spend a lot of time hanging around Oman, which is a very poor country, at least it’s people are. There was a lot of sand, which was pretty much it. Most of the people were very nice, even if we couldn’t understand each other’s language. I reenlisted for 4 years, which 3 of them will be on shore duty.  I’m going to go to school and then get out of the Navy when my time is up.  

I returned from my deployment, and we had our big wedding back home. That was insane the day of, but everything worked out.  We ended up getting pregnant; however, we lost the baby a short time after that. Now we are trying again and hoping that this is the month.  We moved out of our old place and into this house, and we’re getting our life together, together.

As much fun as the Navy has been, it’s had it’s downsides as well.  If it wasn’t for the Navy, I wouldn’t have met the person I’m going to spend the rest of my life with. However, I’m over it. I’m going to school, getting a degree, and getting out.  (Not necessarily in that order).  I don’t want to do this ship thing anymore, I’m good at it, but I can’t handle the selfish people anymore. When one drops, another one pops up, it’s sickening. I was burned by that, and it’s left a sour taste in me about this life.  But, like I said, I don’t regret it, I wouldn’t have met Brittany.

You can read and follow Ryan's blog here: 

It's that time again! 18+ only!

Here I am blogging for EdenFantasys again! The past couple of times I ordered from them, I didn't get any sex toys because I haven't needed any. Still don't, though I did have a scare a few days ago when I couldn't find my little bff. Anyway, I have been ordering from their beauty and body line. As I said in my last post, the kissaholic lip gloss has been amazing!

This last time I ordered from them I got a few outfits to spice up the bedroom and let me say, they really have. I have enjoyed being Nurse Brittany that doesn't care if Mr Dawson is married ;), the naughty maid (who makes the bed only to unmake it hehe) and the school girl who has been VERY bad and deserves a spanking.

Now, my mister has liked my dressing in bedroom attire previously but I never dressed in a costume so to say and played a different role. I must admit, it's fun. And even though you are pretending to not be you, and maybe your husband is pretending it isn't you, the truth is, under those clothes and that fake persona it is you. No need to feel like your husband wants to be with someone else because YOU are the one he is attracted to underneath it all!

I honestly don't know what I will order from them the next but I have a feeling it might be another costume or 2!

Guess what?!

I am totally stoked right now! A few days ago I talked to my husband about guest blogging for me and he has started his draft! The post will be all about his life in the Navy and what it has led him to so it's sure to be a good read.

We got new laptops and I am really excited about that because I have been wanting one for a long time (to call my own at least). Ours was on the edge of crapping out and we decided to just go for it when we were on our way home from North Carolina last night. Yeah, we are crazy impulse buyers (sort of). When we got our tablets it was impulsive as well. We decided to get them, then when Ryan got off work, we went and got them lol.

The trip to North Carolina was a blast, as usual. It was our friends birthday so we all went out to dinner then to a local bar that always promises a good time filled with karaoke and pool, with the occasional darts mixed in and LOTS of talking/dancing!

Now, here we are, back at home, sitting in bed, typing blogs up on our laptops.

I really can't explain how exciting it is to me that Ryan is going to guest post. I have yet to have a guest blogger and I can't think of anyone more fitting then my other half to be the very first! Stay tuned, that blog will be up before this week is over!

Everyone else is doing it! Lol.

1. How did you and your spouse meet?

We met in Indiana when he and my ex were in town for a visit. He didn't really talk to me then so I usually say we officially met in Virginia when I moved in with said ex and he was our roommate.

2. How old were you when you two met?

We were both 23.

3. How long have you been together?

A little over 2 years =)

4. Where are you and your spouse originally from?

He is originally from Hobart, Indiana and I from Michigan City, Indiana.

5. How did you feel about him joining the military?

H was already in, so I didn't have much of anything to say about it haha.

6. Where did your spouse go to basic training?


Great Lakes, IL


7. Has your spouse ever been deployed?

Yes, he has been deployed a total of 2 times since I have known him and 1 or 2 other times before that.

8. Ever been to his promotion ceremony?


Unfortunately he was promoted while they were deployed last year so I couldn't be there :(

9. How long have you been a military wife?


About a year and a half.



10. Did you marry him before or after he joined?


After.


11. How did your husband propose?

We went for a walk on the beach and this happened!: (he was pretending we were taking a picture)

12. Where did you get married?

Our first wedding was done in the mayor of Michigan Citys office. The second was at my life long church in Michigan City.

13. How old were you when you got married?


24


14. Did he wear his uniform on your wedding day?

He sure did. Dress whites for the first one, dress blues for the second one and a suit for the reception.


15. Where are you and your spouse currently stationed?


He is currently stationed at Naval Station Norfolk but is going to Damneck in a few months for shore duty.


16. Do you live on base?

No, we have a house.

17. How long were you married when you had to go through your first separation?

2 weeks :( Then he deployed for 6 months.

18. What is your favorite base so far?


Well we have ever only been here.

19. Do you think your spouse looks good in his uniform?

Uhm, DUH.

20. Do you think military life is more advanced then civilian life?


Not more advanced, just quite different.


21. Do you like the benefits you receive as a military spouse?


Who wouldn't?!


22. Do you have a lot of military wife friends?


I definately do!


23. What is the hardest part of the military life?


The seperation, first and foremost. I'd say the second hardest thing is not being able to make any plans because they can get ripped from you at any given moment.



24. Do you own military wife stuff?

Lol definately. I have a purse and wallet made from his uniform he couldn't use anymore, I have a few shirts, necklaces, key chains, and ribbons for my car.

25. Do you support your spouse as a member of the military?

Yes and no. I mean, of course I support him and would continue to support him if he decided to stay in but he is trying to get out after shore duty and I honestly pray that happens because him being around for our future child/ren means everything to me. Plus, I don't want to go through any more deployments.

Something I never talked about during deployment:

A blog follower of mine requested that I touch base on the communication aspect of the military life so I decided I was going to talk about the issue Ryan and I had while he was on deployment. The man I always make out to be wonderful and perfect had a GIANT flaw during deployment: communication.

Yeah, he emailed me once a day usually. Some days he just plain forgot and that made me feel like crap. The thing with those emails though? He never really said he missed me. He never openly expressed how he felt about being away from me. I always told him I missed him and he never said it back. I always told him how sad I felt that day and why I felt that way and his reply would say how much work he did or didn't do that day or how tired he was then a quick I love you! and off to bed he went.

That wasn't my issue though. My issue was hearing his voice. I can honestly say I heard his voice an average of ONCE a month while he was deployed. I saw his face ONCE the whole time he was deployed and that wasn't even on Skype, that was in a picture he sent me when he hit his first port of the deployment. That was all  I got. Every time they were in port I dealt with hearing "Skyping with my hubby!" or "Yay my hubby called!!!" and I just got let down time and time again.

See, Ryan was a freshly married man who didn't really get bothered about the seperation as much as I did. Again, that broke my heart. You married me because you supposedly love me so much? Why don't you f****** miss me? You REALLY wanted to spend the rest of your life with me but you don't miss me when you're gone?? Deployment murdered my heart and it wasn't until about a month before deployment was over that the pieces were put back together.

Back to the port visits... This was a never ending cycle: Email from him says he will be in port tomorrow. I get excited because this means I get to hear his voice for the first time in a month! He says he will call me. He gets really drunk and forgets to call me. Port after port after port this happened. About a month before Ryan was to return home I had the last straw. He promised a phone call and I never got one. It was around midnight my time and 5 or 6 am his time and he called me. I was deep into my second bottle of spumante at that point and in He woman Ryan hater mode. His call surprised me and I started bawling and then and there my drunk self told him everything. How badly he hurt me every time he did that and just how often he did it. He didn't even realize he was doing it so much. I told him to never tell me he would call me while he was in port again because I couldn't handle him breaking my heart even one more time and he said okay with a certain shyness and guilt in his voice. Then he had to go because they were pulling out of that port and that was that.

About a week ish later I got the "I'm about to be in port" email and I didn't really know how to respond except for with a  "Well, if you can call me, cool. If not, cool" attitude. Ryan called me that night. He was drunk, I, not so much. But what happened that night was the breaking point in that never ending monthly cycle. Ryan apologized. Ryan cried and told me how much he misses me and wishes he were home. Ryan told me how much he loved me and how bad he felt for hurting me so badly. Ryan was finally saying everything I had longed for him to say during the whole deployment and, in Ryans voice, you just knew he was being honest and had completely opened his heart to me. Ryan made up for all the pain I had felt in just that one conversation and we fell in love all over again before he even got back from that deployment 3 ish weeks later.

That was my skeleton. Only 1 or 2 people other then Ryan and I knew about that before now. The only advice I can give for those of you that are having issues with communication is, if you can't find a way to work through it, it's not supposed to be worked through. If that man or woman truly loves you, he or she will find a way to make it up to you and you never know when to expect it so just keep holding out for him or her. Just when you think you can't take it anymore, you might get the surprise of your life.

(Insert adorable title here)

This past week, Ryan was home on leave. I seriously thought he was going to drive me up a wall but he really didn't. It was quite the opposite actually. We enjoyed spending every moment of every day together. It is a cherished thing, that time, since we don't get it often.

Ryan was incredibly sweet while he was home. One day he even gave me the greatest complement. He said: You never wear make up and you're always pretty! Seriously, without make up, all the time!" and he seemed surprised that anyone could be pretty all the time without make up. It was such a great complement to me and it gave me warm fuzzies :) I just think he is soo sweet.


Something as simple as me finding out I was wearing a size too small in bras was something serious enough to him for him to tell me to get 3 new bras and even helped me pick them out. I know it might not sound like anything amazing, but to me it was. He said "I want my wife to be comfortable" and, well, I now am lol.


We have had an awesome start to the new year so far, except for having to drop almost a grand into my car because the heater core is totally jacked. But seriously? The car is worth it and my husband agrees. Other then that, I have been blessed and have lost 6 pounds so far with 30 more to go but I am well on my way!


I was going to blog about something totally different today, but I am just too happy with life to go back to deployment and something that bothered me so much today. To the reader who asked me to touch base on that subject, I promise it will be in my next blog!

My favorite wedding present (a long overdue post)

Throughout my whole life there has been one person I have always adored and will never forget. She has placed an unbeatable impact on my life. My 2nd grade teach, Mrs. Nancy Russell.

No matter how many rough memories I have of public school, 2nd grade always puts a smile on my face. You see, Mrs. Russell inspired me to write all the time. She even got one of my books published and put in the schools library. Mrs. Russell is probably the reason I write this blog.

When Mrs. Russell saw our wedding announcement in the Michigan City News Dispatch, she didn't waste one minute before calling my parents house to congratulate me on the engagement. Of course, I wasn't there and neither were my parents but she made sure to leave a message for them to give to me and left her phone number so I could contact her. I had wanted to invite her to the wedding and that message made that invitation solid. As soon as my parents told me she had called and gave me the number, I called her. She and I have always been close and tried to keep in contact over the years, and as trying as it may be, we have managed.

A year later, she came to the wedding but she couldn't come to the reception. As a matter of fact, she bearly had the time to come to the wedding but she came anyway. A couple of days before the wedding, she dropped a present off at my parents house. It included a decorative pillow, a journal that she wrote a sweet note in and the big bomb, a book of poems that I had written and gave her in SECOND GRADE. She kept it all those years and that meant a great deal to me. It brought tears to my eyes even. I couldn't stop shaking when I saw it. Then we read it a got a really good laugh at 8 year old me's expense. It really, truly to this day is my favorite wedding gift. I don't think she will ever know just how much it meant to me. Here are a few pictures from the book:

I'm pretty sure my favorite "poem" is this one (pictured with the seashells on it lol):
"Seashell, Seashell what do you wish" By Brittany Seppyes
Seashell, seashell what do you wish?
I'm here on the hot sand, I want to be with the fish.
Throw me out in the sea please!
Okay, I'll throw you far into the sea!
I wonder what I shall do now.
I will leave the beach and go feed the cow.

My 8 year old masterpiece. Don't even try to pretend it wasn't brilliantly hilarious.