Tis the season!

If you would have asked me last year I would have said bah humbug about decorating for Christmas. This year is a whole nother story. Last year Ryan was deployed. This year we put the tree up together and decorated the house inside and out. I am totally loving it! We even get the chance to go to the Christmas ball for his ship together and I so cant wait! I bought my dress 2 weeks ago and I am really excited to be able to share that post withyou when the time comes :) In the meantime, here are pictures of our decorating for our very first Christmas together!


I am so in love with B4A

And I have wanted one of their bracelets for quite some time. Wouldn't you know Christina @ The Journey of a Navy Wife is doing a giveaway! The prize? This Pearl Harbor tribute bracelet: http://www.nicanorphotography.com//~stores/361887_preview.jpg

I have loved what Bands for Arms did for a long time. They post this right on their store site: B4A is a family business, supporting our US Military Sailors, Marines, Airmen, Soldiers, and Coast Guard.
B4A supports The USO Japan, Project Lifting Spirits, The National WWII Museum, and The Marine Corps Toys For Tots Foundation. 

They have donated money to the troops ever since the beginning! Go check them out!: http://ourb4astore.com/index.html and go check out Christinas contest!


I am so excited!!

Kelsey at Bear at Sea is in the middle of making me an adorable new layout and I am super stoked! You guys really should go check out her page. She is a really sweet, adorable girl and her blog is worth reading. I hope you will trust me and go check her out! All you have to do is click here: Bear at Sea

Anywho, hubby is underway and I am spending the time he is away with one of my besties, Kristen. Her hubby is away right now too so we figured why be alone? I'm not sure and I really hope it's not the case but I feel like I might be coming down with something yucky. I hope not, cuz I don't want to get her sick.

I may have gotten my dress for the ships Christmas ball. Depends on whether the hubby likes it well enough. I feel a little worried about it because I have never worn anything like it. It is really mature and classy so I feel mildly old in it. In actuality, if I wear it I will be dressing my age. We will see.



Warning: This is going to be one of those mushy, crazy in love posts. This is our story:

When I first met Ryan almost 4 years ago, he didn't say one word to me except for when I asked what kind of phone he had. It was quite shocking since we were at my friends house and only 4 other people were there for hours. I just figured, whatev.

Shortly later I started dating his roommate. A month or so later, I was living with them. I packed up and moved the Virginia from Indiana to be with this guy that ended up being the biggest jerk on earth. Anyway, Ryan and I became really good friends over the year that I lived with them. We watched tv shows together and did a lot of stuff together. Trust me when I say I never expected our friendship to end up this way.

One night, he even let me cry on his shoulder when I found out my bf had went on a date with another girl on a night he said he was "going out with the guys". I was crushed. I packed all my stuff and was ready to move back to Indiana. My bf at the time cried and begged me to stay so I did. A couple months later him and Ryan deployed (they were on the same ship). I had a feeling my bf wouldn't stay faithful and I cried and cried on the pier while watching them leave. Ryan said he even teared up watching me.

My gut was right and I broke up with my bf and 2 weeks later moved back to Indiana. Of course that whole time Ryan and I stayed in contact via email and the occasional overseas phone call. The night the ship got back from deployment, Ryan got super drunk and spilled his guts to me. He told me he loved me and always has, even when I was with the ex. Did I mention Ryan stopped being friends with my ex after he cheated on me? Yeah. I just laughed it off at the time because we were such good friends and he was so drunk that I didn't know if he had a clue what he really felt. Turns out he totally knew.

He came to Indiana where his family also happens to live and I was going to move back to Virginia with him as friends a couple days later when he went back. We went out with a couple of my friends and after we left the bar we stopped to get food at McDonalds. Let me say first that I had never made the first move but sparks were flying and Ryan wasn't going to so I did. I planted a kiss on him in the drive thru. It was epic lol. Then we went to my friends house and stayed up until like 5 am. Then we had to wake up around 6:30 am because Ryan needed to get his car checked out. So, lacking sleep, we went to his mom and dads and then to the mechanic.

Fast forward 3 days and we are on our way back to Virginia. We were just inside of Kentucky when Ryan said "I can't take this anymore" and pulled into a rest stop. I was like "hmm he must have to pee" (LOL). He pulled all the way around and parked where there were no other cars then looked at me and planted an extra passionate, fully sober kiss on me. Then he said "Will you go steady with me?" and OMG did I ever smile. It took me a minute to answer because I was so scared of losing the amazing friendship we had but in the end I said yes. The rest of the way to Virginia we held hands and I smiled on and off the whole trip. These were the songs that came on back to back after we left the rest stop and they have held a special place in my heart ever since:

5 months later this happened:

2 months after that, this happened:

2 weeks later I said "see you later" to him as I watched the ship leave the pier for deployment with a very heavy heart and bearly fighting back tears.

6 months later was the happiest day of my life and I never even shared all the amazing shots my photographer took, so here some of them are!

 This one was important to me because it was devastating to me when they took the stairs                                 away on D Day. Watching them put them back took the weight of the world off my shoulders!

                       My "Where is my husband?! Everyone else is off the ship already!" picture lol.

We might live our life like this last song far too often BUT he is so much more then worth it <3


This is getting real old, real quick. + my Thursday link up!

First thing is first. Gotta link my song up with Goodnight Moon! I really love this song. There is no rhyme or reason as to why I chose it other then the fact that it is one of the most touching and beautiful songs I have ever laid my ears on.

In other news, Sailor man is about to go underway again. He just got back from this last underway on Monday, then had duty so he couldn't even come home until Tuesday. Even when he finally was able to come home Tuesday, he didn't get off until about 5 and didn't get home until about 6. Same thing yesterday. Today, they are running drills so he won't be home until about 8 pm. I'm sure he wont be home any earlier then 6 tomorrow too. It's really sickening. All of these underways have been hogging all of our weekends together too, not to mention his only 2 days off. For the past 2 months at least they have been either leaving for the underway on a Friday or a Saturday. I am so over it. I can't say this enough, I SO can't wait for him to get off this ship!

Some days I just want to scream into a pillow but I know that wont make anything better, it will just make my throat sore. Today has been one of those days. I mean, I don't expect at all for a miracle to happen and me get pregnant after trying for only one month HOWEVER, after suffering a miscarriage, getting pregnant is what I want more then anything in the whole world.

I am still grieving in a way. I still want my baby back. Right now I should have a baby bump that is ever growing. I should have heard my babys heartbeat and saw it's tiny little body at least a couple times by now. I miss everything about being pregnant. I mostly miss my baby. I have gotten a LOT better. I don't think about it every day, just every now and then. I shed a tear today when (TMI) I started my period but that is the first time I felt sad for my baby angel since I started my last period. It was something I knew was going to happen but I had a little bit of hope that by some miracle, it wouldn't start and I would be pregnant.

Alas, Aunt Flo is here and a baby is not and I just have to put on my big girl (period) panties and deal with it. It's not like I haven't dealt with it for this long already. Heck, we got to start trying again 2 months earlier then I thought we could anyway so I don't know what I am even whining about. I think it's the pms.