Hello, it's me...

Hey everyone. It's been quite a long time since the last post. How has everyone been?

Life as we know it here is about to explode. In 2 days, Ryan goes to Japan for two years, unaccompanied. I don't know how I am handling it. I'm emotional but unable to show it. It's all in my head and my heart. I'm dying on the inside but I can't seem to get it out. Monday morning is going to make me sick. I am probably going to scream. How can my kids go so long without daddy? Why do I have to miss my husband so much that my heart cries instead of my eyes? This does not feel real at all. Not one bit.

Of course, I came back and immediately I am posting a negative blog... However, I need to get my feelings out. This is my "diary" basically.

We are packing our house.

We sold our bedroom set, dining table and chairs, couch and chair, spare bedroom mattress... We decided we would just start fresh when he gets back.

I am having a really hard time finding the strength and motivation to finish packing. It's tough knowing we will no longer have a house here. Leaving so so many memories. We have owned this house for 6 years. We made our children here. They said their first words, crawled, walked, grew up... So many memories being left here. I cannot believe it's all going to be gone. Oh, my heart.

Lord, please give me peace.